Wanted: the perfect Mr not so Clean

I am Mr not so Clean. You may not know me (yet),but you’ll want to once you finish this text. I am a criminal of many fields. You may remember the United California Bank Robbery, in ’72? Yes, that was me. 30 million dollars, right in my pocket. You may wonder how I haven’t been caught yet. Well, it’s mostly because I’m actually bald, but always wear a wig in public, so when the police were looking for the bald man that was involved in this heist, they didn’t even consider me being a suspect. I also have a limp, that was caused in ’82, because I was being chased by the police and had to jump off a building. So from then on, I always used a cane. Of course, this isn’t a regular cane. It was custom made in Switzerland, and the handle of the cane actually has a button I can press so that a fiery laser beam shoots out the bottom of the cane. After reading all this, you probably want to become friends with me. I don’t blame you. But I’ll have to warn you, I’m very strict and picky in choosing my… partner in crime. That’s right, I’m looking for a partner in crime, because I’m planning a new bank robbery. I’m looking for someone who’s intelligent, so we can come up with a good plan, and you also have to be very fast, so we don’t get caught. Lastly, I’m looking for someone who’s also bald, or al least willing to shave their head. You might not believe it, but my being bald has saved me from many court cases. Meet me on Saturday at 7 pm at the park near the bakery, but beware, because I have incredible eyesight, and if I see anyone with weapons or a suspicious looking face, I will use my cane on yo